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Till Kaeslin

For a long time, I treated my queer identity like that old laundry-day shirt at the back of everyone’s closet. Ya, you know the one.

Sure you own that shirt, but you’re not attached to it.

You can’t remember where you first picked it up, all you know is it’s still two sizes too big and you’re too lazy to get…

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Yesterday, as I took some time in the middle of my workday to work out, I felt the familiar feeling of anxiety burning a hole in my chest.

A few, half-distracted core exercises later, I figured out exactly what it was that was bothering me. As soon as I did…

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“And just like that …” the Sex and the City franchise lost a little bit of its magic.

No, I don’t want a Sex and the City reboot — and that’s coming from one of the biggest SATC fans alive. Probably.

I don’t bestow that title lightly. I’ve watched every episode of SATC three, maybe four times over. I follow an Instagram account solely devoted to the fashion and politics of SATC, Every…

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Yesterday, I went to the doctor’s to get a full STI test done.

I’m not proud of it, but I could feel my face go red when I willed myself to ask my doctor about specific testing for anal STIs.

I’m totally comfortable talking to my friends about the sex I’m having, and I even write about it on the internet sometimes, so why did this feel so … off-limits?

As my brain ruminated over that very…

Photo by Dan Gold on Unsplash

My lease is up in about a month and a half, and until just a few days ago, I had no idea what I was going to do when that last day came.

What changed? Well, I figured out who I’m going to live with.

What didn’t change? Everything else…

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Not to sound like a total PV gay, but it’s true: Up until yesterday morning, I was getting ready to pack my bags for Baja California.

My two friends and I had hatched the travel plans over the summer — I guess in desperate hope that things would have been…

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Nearly a month ago now, I started my first-ever Substack newsletter, That’s Gay.

Three issues in, and I posted a newsletter titled “Let’s talk about sex, baby! : Breaking down anal sex taboos by answering my own questions.”

Recipients of this newsletter included any and all strangers on the internet…

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“But then we should stop texting now,” I messaged my new Tinder match — the very same one I had just learned one message prior was going to be out of town for the week. “Otherwise we’ll get bored, have that awkward text burnout, and never meet up. …

Photo by Warren Wong on Unsplash

When I was in Pre-K, I was never the kid to get sent home with a “doesn’t play well with others” note on my Spongebob sticker-covered report card.

My parents would never let me forget that I was the class distractor from day one.

If I had a penny for every time I was separated from a friend in class, told to focus in the middle…

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Stop saying 2021 is going to be an amazing year. You don’t know that, and I don’t want you projecting all over my subconscious — you’re getting its hopes up.

No, 2021 may not be an “amazing year”, and why should it be? Time, the universe, and the spherical floating…

Till Kaeslin

20-something writing from my Facebook marketplace-adopted desk in Harlem * Sender of ‘That’s Gay’, the newsletter *

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